I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize
