Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
