Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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