it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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