I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
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