Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize