Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
you traded sex for a burrito?
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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