you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
