I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Randomize
