I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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