We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Randomize
