While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
