i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
Randomize