He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
