I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Randomize
