I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Drunk walkin through police station. America
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
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