Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Randomize
