dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
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