I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
