Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
