out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
