it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
