bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Randomize
