i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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