to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
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