No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize