He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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