She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
