omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize
