quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Randomize
