I got chris browned last night
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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