idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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