I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Randomize
