Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
I need to stop coming to work sober
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
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