i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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