Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
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