after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Randomize
