My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Randomize
