I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
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