I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
