this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
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