you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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