I want to walk on stilts...naked
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
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