So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
