Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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