just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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