there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
