ugly people sure do ruin things
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize