Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Randomize
