i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Randomize
