She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Randomize
